Day 2-Evaluating Success

Nothing totally profound happened today, but I have been called upon to complete one more assignment for the course I completed last week, Foundations of Justice. We discussed at length, often in the form of how not to be a lawyer, how to be good lawyers, and good members of the profession, and somehow still be good people. Lawyers get a bad rap for being, well, not very good people. We discussed whether something being legal also makes it right. And we read a charming article about the detrimental affects that being a lawyer can have on your physical and mental health, your relationships and on your happiness. Outlook not good. So how do we avoid that? One question I was asked to ponder for my assignment is:

By what criteria will you be able to judge if you are a success 10 years from now?

That is, to avoid getting sucked into the rat race for more money, more power, more glamour, more windows in your office, identify now what will measure your success. Or more simply, set these goals so that you don't forget that at one time, something simpler was your wildest dream and when you have arrived at that, you can be happy and content that you are a success and you don't need more.

I am finding this question difficult to answer because my 5-year or 10-year plan has always been aimed at getting to law school. I have some ideas of what I'd like to do after, but my success has always been tied up in getting to exactly where I am at this very moment. So, now what? By what can I measure future success? Here's my thoughts so far:

1. I have always said that when I'm not a poor college-student, I will send money to PBS stations and tell them they can keep the gift.

2. I have always joked that when I'm a rich lawyer, I want my own jet, or helicopter. I'm not picky. A prop plane would probably suffice. I don't even want to fly it (Andy will, of course.) I just want the freedom to live wherever I really want my home and still be able to get to the office for work without a grueling commute and get to a civilized city that has Target and a real grocery store. Ok, this is probably more like the 45-year plan, but just so you know, it's in the back of my mind.

3. I want to tithe. I have not ever felt like I could give 10% of my money to church or charity without probably getting evicted.

4. I want to own my own home and have a yard to garden in. I want to paint the walls whatever color I choose, and have carpet that isn't white or beige! Who picks such ridiculous carpet when you know that it gets stained? Especially when you are renting a property to total strangers! Obviously, they've never met me. I'm growing fond of the navy scrap of carpet in my father-in-law's basement. I'll bet he has NEVER vacuumed it, and you can't tell!

5. I want kids, or the possibility of kids. I want a job for me, and a job for Andy, that supplies us with enough money to be stable, and enough time to be good parents. This is a long ways down the road, Mom, so don't worry yourself. See Goal 2. about the jet.

6. I want time to do good things for other people. I don't just mean volunteering or mentoring, or doing pro bono legal work. I want time to do all those things, and still have time to bake cookies to send to wherever my friends Amanda and Sierra are living (because we all know it won't be anywhere near enough to come by my house to just eat the cookies) and to help friends move, and to take casseroles to people when they are suffering or under stress.

7. I want to be happy. In the one of my favorite movies, one character asks another "How often are you happy in your marriage?" She responds, "Every day. Not all day, but every day." I want to be happy not all day, maybe not even every day, but I want to have an overall sense that I am happy. I know from experience that this happiness may not come from just one place, and it certainly will not mean that I am happy with every aspect of my life. Overall, now, I am happy. I am also the kind of person who can't seem to hide when I'm very unhappy with even one part of my life, so I think I will continue to be happy as long as I listen to that voice saying "The unhappiness with this part is dragging down the other parts. It's time to fix it."



I welcome all your comments in response to the question, too. How will I know success in 10 years?